A new report in the online magazine PLos Medicine reveals that through surveys of Americans, 16.2 percent of Americans had tried cocaine at least once, and 42.4 percent had used marijuana, making us number one in the world for illegal drug use. This is in comparison to New Zealand, who came in a close second, where just 4.3 percent of study participants had used cocaine, and 41.9 percent marijuana.

In the Netherlands, where drug policy is more liberal than the United States, 1.9 percent of survey participants said they had used cocaine and 19.8 percent marijuana.

Twelve US 12 states including California permit medical use of marijuana, but possession and use remains prohibited under federal law.

And despite the US government’s massive anti-drug efforts, the United States remains the world’s top drug market, one amply supplied by South American cartels.

The US Drug Enforcement Agency has observed ever larger quantities of illegal drugs pouring into the country.

“We are seizing greater quantities of illegal drugs than ever before,” said a DEA statement last week.

In 2007, agents seized 41 metric tons of cocaine in just two raids, and denied drug traffickers record-breaking revenue of 3.5 billion dollars for the year, it said.

We may get our asses handed to us in every single sport at the Olympics this year, but goddamn it if we won’t give a shit ’cause we’ll all be too yay’d out and stoned. USA! USA!