This awesome clip of Video Matt eating a maggot ridden Snickers bar!!! OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG. Really though, it was kind of on some disgusting ass shit, when right after he took it out of his mouth to go puke for awhile, like two gigantic sandworm looking maggots crawled out of their little Snickers tunnels to see what the fuck was crackin. AHHH YOUTH!! But maggots aren’t all bad. In fact, Maggot Therapy is one of the new cures being used to treat the dreaded Superbug that Spencer was rapping about last week. Now that’s REAL TALK

The aforementioned Superbug is hitting close to home. Here at Synthesis headquarters we have set up a quarantine around my desk because I have the immune system stamina of a 4-month old AIDS baby.

Yuba City school latest with student infection
The Associated Press
Article Launched: 11/03/2007 08:08:23 PM PDT

YUBA CITY, Calif.—A Yuba City elementary school is the latest to announce that a student has an antibiotic-resistant infection.

Yuba City Unified School District is sending parents warning letters about Methicillin-Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus—commonly called MRSA—after the staph infection was confirmed Friday.
The letter urges parents to have children wash their hands regularly and to avoid sharing clothing or towels. The infected child’s classroom is also being disinfected.
Meanwhile, Chico State University is reporting 31 students have tested positive for MRSA since January.

Read about MRSA at http://www.buttecounty.net/publichealth

QUICK! EVERYBODY PANIC!

There is a strain of staph infection on the loose and it’s COMING STRAIGHT FOR YOU!

It goes in your EAR and is more deadly than HIV.

Not even our children are safe. It’s TARGETING OUR YOUNG!

There’s NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO KEEP SAFE FROM THE SUPERBUG!

Companies are positioning themselves to MAKE MONEY OFF YOUR MISERY!

Staphylococcus aureus! Streptococcus pneunomiae! HELP!!!!!!!!!

Actually, back when I had cable television, I remember watching a show on the History Channel about WWI, and how an outbreak of tuberculoses or some shit shortly after the war actually caused more American deaths than the whole war. As much as the media hypes up some terribly imperative issue to keep use paralyzed with fear, then quickly move on to the next news item to keep us paralyzed with fear, pausing only to talk about ugly-ass vapid heiresses and movie star marriages, what ens up killing us all will inevitably be something like the common cold. YAY!