I couldn’t have foreseen this in a million years. America’s pride and joy, the store that stocks both anti-depressants and shot gun shells, is leaning towards the right wing.

Wal-Mart has recently warned that if the Dems do win the presidential nomination, there’s a likelihood that it will be easier for workers to unionize larger companies. The superstore has always been known for it’s slave fair labor practices, and doesn’t see the need for it’s workers to form labor unions. Besides, who needs medical insurance and workman’s comp anyways?

Wal-Mart Stores Inc. is mobilizing its store managers and department supervisors around the country to warn that if Democrats win power in November, they’ll likely change federal law to make it easier for workers to unionize companies — including Wal-Mart.

In recent weeks, thousands of Wal-Mart store managers and department heads have been summoned to mandatory meetings at which the retailer stresses the downside for workers if stores were to be unionized.

According to about a dozen Wal-Mart employees who attended such meetings in seven states, Wal-Mart executives claim that employees at unionized stores would have to pay hefty union dues while getting nothing in return, and may have to go on strike without compensation. Also, unionization could mean fewer jobs as labor costs rise.

The actions by Wal-Mart — the nation’s largest private employer — reflect a growing concern among big business that a reinvigorated labor movement could reverse years of declining union membership. That could lead to higher payroll and health costs for companies already being hurt by rising fuel and commodities costs and the tough economic climate.

The Wal-Mart human-resources managers who run the meetings don’t specifically tell attendees how to vote in November’s election, but make it clear that voting for Democratic presidential hopeful Sen. Barack Obama would be tantamount to inviting unions in, according to Wal-Mart employees who attended gatherings in Maryland, Missouri and other states.

“The meeting leader said, ‘I am not telling you how to vote, but if the Democrats win, this bill will pass and you won’t have a vote on whether you want a union,’” said a Wal-Mart customer-service supervisor from Missouri. “I am not a stupid person. They were telling me how to vote,” she said.

America’s biggest employer, and the working conditions are pretty much intolerable… but hey, where else can you go and get XXL pants, camouflage night vision goggles and McDonalds at 3 in the morning?  SCORE!

Republican Senator David Vitter joined the “I banged a prostitute” club, which is gaining membership like crazy. After standing next to his pissed off wife with his tail between his legs Vitter tried to get the hell out of the press conference. But this doesn’t really work out for him. I think he was more concerned about the hooker in the trunk of the car than backing up.

Hills star / spawn of Satan / Hollywood star Heidi Montag told Us Weekly “I’m voting for John McCain, I’m a Republican and McCain has a lot of experience.” Montag then minimized her endorsement and refered to herself in the third person saying “I don’t think anyone cares who Heidi Montag votes for.”

In what might possibily be scarer news John McCain admits to Time magazine that he watches The Hills: “I’m honored to have Heidi’s support and I want to assure her that I never miss an episode of ‘The Hills,’ especially since the new season started”. He also added “she’s a very talented actress” which defies all logic and makes me start to think that the early stages of senility have kicked in.

Hopefully no one will tell her that you actually have to register to vote before you can actually vote.

Shocker.
Even though countless people have begged him to stay out Ralph Nader said he’s running for President as a third party candidate. 73 year old Nader is running under the idea to “shift the power from the few to the many.” Sounds great on paper right?

Mike Huckabee enjoyed reminding CNN that Nader’s past runs have shown that he pulls votes from the Democrat and said “So naturally, Republicans would welcome his entry into the race.” Thanks for the reminder Mike…

Nader added “If the Democrats can’t landslide the Republicans this year, they ought to just wrap up, close down, emerge in a different form.” Kind of a good point if you think about it.

For the record most of us here at Synthesis are pulling for Obama.

Not only is Presidential Candidate and Former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee not dropping out of the race, he’s making special effort to get face time on morning talk shows just so he can talk shit. Watch him GO OFF on today’s edition of Morning Joe with Joe Scarborough.

So a lot of people I know have been saying a lot of good things about Ron Paul, the darkhorse Republican Presidential Candidate who has made a name for himself with his unflinching dedication to withdrawing troops from Iraq and actually instituting the small-government type shit that Republicans always talk about but never actually do.  However, a look back at some of the Texas Congressman’s old newsletters uncovers more than a few somewhat questionable opinions, to put it mildly. Though nebulous in their actual authorship, the passages in the newsletter all ran with the implicit editorial signature of Paul himself. A few of the better excerpts:On Martin Luther King Jr:

A “world-class philanderer who beat up his paramours,” “seduced underage girls and boys,” and “made a pass at” fellow civil rights leader Ralph Abernathy. One newsletter ridiculed black activists who wanted to rename New York City after King, suggesting that “Welfaria,” “Zooville,” “Rapetown,” “Dirtburg,” and “Lazyopolis” were better alternatives. The same year, King was described as “a comsymp, if not an actual party member, and the man who replaced the evil of forced segregation with the evil of forced integration.” 

 On AIDS victims in San Francisco:

“[T]hese men don’t really see a reason to live past their fifties. They are not married, they have no children, and their lives are centered on new sexual partners.” Also, “they enjoy the attention and pity that comes with being sick.” 

Paul’s newsletter was also supportive of some interesting causes. Such as right-wing militia groups:

In January 1995, three months before right-wing militants bombed the Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City, a newsletter listed “Ten Militia Commandments,” describing “the 1,500 local militias now training to defend liberty” as “one of the most encouraging developments in America.” It warned militia members that they were “possibly under BATF [Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms] or other totalitarian federal surveillance” and printed bits of advice from the Sons of Liberty, an anti-government militia based in Alabama–among them, “You can’t kill a Hydra by cutting off its head,” “Keep the group size down,” “Keep quiet and you’re harder to find,” “Leave no clues,” “Avoid the phone as much as possible,” and “Don’t fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here.” 

 And everyone’s favorite, David Duke:

In a passage titled “The Duke’s Victory,” a newsletter celebrated Duke’s 44 percent showing in the 1990 Louisiana Republican Senate primary. “Duke lost the election,” it said, “but he scared the blazes out of the Establishment.” In 1991, a newsletter asked, “Is David Duke’s new prominence, despite his losing the gubernatorial election, good for anti-big government forces?” The conclusion was that “our priority should be to take the anti-government, anti-tax, anti-crime, anti-welfare loafers, anti-race privilege, anti-foreign meddling message of Duke, and enclose it in a more consistent package of freedom.” 

Duke has, of course, returned the favor in kind, offering frequent updates on and support for the Paul campaign on his website. If you’re one of the tens of thousands of people who’ve given Paul money over the internet, there’s only one thing I can say: PWN3D!!!!!!!!!!!!111