Kucinich ‘08 motherfucker. Also known as wasting my own goddamn time.

Proof:

Just now I was rereading my glorious pwning of John McCain from yesterday on this here blog, when I noticed not one but TWO John McCain for President Banners in the direct vicinity, basically drowning out my opinion with their patriotic overtones and team-building pleasantries.

Damn.

During a recent campaign speech in Florida, John McCain warned the crowd “I’m sorry to tell you, there’s going to be other wars. We will never surrender but there will be other wars.” How’s that for optimism? According to political pundit and former Republican Presidential candidate Pat Buchanan, a vote for McCain is basically a vote for war with Iran.

“You get John McCain in the White House, and I do believe we will be at war with Iran. There’s no doubt John McCain is going to be a war president. … His whole career is wrapped up in the military, national security. He’s in Putin’s face, he’s threatening the Iranians, we’re going to be in Iraq a hundred years.”

Buchanan’s not exaggerating about Iraq either. John McCain actually said he’s fine with that too:

He later clarifyied that troops could be there ‘thousand years’ or ‘a million years,’ for all he cares. Talk about legacy.

To make matter worse, John McCain is a certified Myspace STEALER:

John McCain’s people commandeered my world-renowned MySpace design template and did a few things wrong:

They did not credit me for the template, even though the template explicitly requested credit.

They used my own unmodified imagery, specifically for the “Contacting John McCain” table.

As if #2 wasn’t bad enough, the McCain crew is actually pulling their image directly from my server on each page load. So every time someone visits the McCain MySpace page, my bandwidth is being used to deliver part of the page! Bad McCain!

Luckily this led directly to lulz:

The McCain campaign of course immediately swung into action, dispatching their obviously crack squad of 1337 Myspace page cr34t0r5 to solve the problem. Or not.

So anyways, if you want a president who loves war, thinks the internet is a series of tubes, and looks like the emperor from Star Wars, VOTE MCCAIN ‘08!!111

Fred Thompson announced today that he is dropping out of the race for President, after finishing a distant 45345th in the South Carolina primary, behind Mickey Mouse, Ron Paul, Pope John Paul, and John Paul Jones among others. Lucky for us though, his campaign will forever be remembered for leaving us possibly the most annoying YouTube video EVAR. Seriously, try to watch the whole thing. I dare you. I was gonna make a joke about “Heath Ledger tried to watch it earlier today” but then I thought that might be in bad taste, and here at Synthesis, we don’t do bad taste.

Depending on who you ask, Jay-Z is set to quit/was already fired as President of Def Jam Recordings:

A source told the New York Daily News newspaper: “He wanted big, big money from the owners Universal Music and that was way out of sync with the realities of today’s record business. “L.A. Reid, the Chief Executive Officer of Island/ Def Jam Records, and his boss Doug Morris have found Jay-Z’s demands excessive in light of the amount of time he’s spent on tour. “Everyone knows he’s not around the office much. Everyone at Universal loves him, but they just can’t justify paying him the money he wants when so many people have to be laid off.”

God bless them, I really hope we elect Big Business as President of the United States in 2008. I think they’re running under the Melt Your Fucking Face Big Business/Melvins ticket.

When I see Big Business the only adjective I can think of is “presidential.”

Damn, I guess W really lowered the bar for that.
If you’re a Californian, you have 3 opportunities to check out Big Biz and Isis next week. Don’t blow it.

Hey Interpals!

Been having some trouble with the Myspace show posting thing, they wouldn’t let us enter the venue for some reason.
So for the record:

Sunday, November 18th–Isis and Big Business
in San Francisco at
SLIM’S
333 Eleventh Street
San Francisco, CA

Monday, November 19th–Isis and Big Business in
San Luis Obispo, CA at
DOWNTOWN BREW
1119 Garden Street
San Luis Obispo, CA 93401

and finally
Tuesday, November 20th–Isis and Big Business
in Los Angeles at
THE TROUBADOUR
9081 Santa Monica Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90069

There!

Melvins have some shows coming up around new years, more on that later. Thanks to all who came to our shows this year. We had a great time, hope you did too.
Taste the Power!
BigBiz