Fans of grim, stoney music that drones on for days rejoice: Neurot Recordings has announced its 2008 release schedule. In addition to bands making their debut for the label (such as Guapo, whose latest album Elixirs is out now), there are also some familiar faces. Neurosis’s Steve Von Till will have a new solo album, A Grave Is a Grim Horse, out on May 19th, as will band mate Scott Kelly (pictured), whose sophomore solo effort The Wake is slated for a May 5th release.

Honestly, a lot of the Neurosis stuff puts me to sleep, but if the MP3s of Kelly and Von Till’s previous works are any indication, I’m really looking forward to their new solo albums. Really grainy, stripped down sort of singer/songwriter stuff. Check out Kelly’s “Flower” from Spirit Bound Flesh: MP3 or Von Till’s “This River” from Should I Fall to the Field: MP3

Full schedule (through June, anyway) after the jump as well as remaining West Coast tour dates for Neurot’s Red Sparrowes, who are on the road with the face-melting Russian Circles. (more…)

Keep your eye out for A Life For Sale in Perth, Australia. It’s “a beautiful place to live,” and it’s all set up, waiting for you. Ebay has always been a bazaar of the bizarre (past things for sale: a grilled cheese sandwich that looks like the Virgin Mary, a pretzel shaped like Abraham Lincoln; once someone tried to sell a punch in the face…), but today the game was stacked even higher when recently-divorced Ian Usher put his entire life up for auction. In a grand sweeping gesture, the 44-year old Australian adventure enthusiast is selling everything, from his house and all his possessions, to his relationship with his friends and their pets (Usher’s closest friends have pledged to be nice to whoever wins the auction, which is set to begin June 22nd and end June 29th).

From his web site:

Hi there, my name is Ian Usher, and I have had enough of my life! I don’t want it any more! You can have it if you like!

No, I’m not contemplating suicide, I am going to sell my life!! I have my reasons, for further details click the “Why” tab below. However, I am still not sure whether this is inspired madness, complete foolishness, or just some sort of mid-life crisis.

Whatever it is, it’s all going up for sale in one big auction. Everything I have and everything I am.

On the day it is all sold and settled I intend to walk out of my front door with my wallet in one pocket and my passport in the other, nothing else at all, and get on the train, with no idea where I am going or what the future holds for me.

Sadly, he still gets to retain control of his own destiny and central nervous system, which I was hoping he’d throw into the auction. That would make the $500,000 price tag he’s hoping for totally worth it.

I thought this post would somehow link in with Daniel’s post yesterday of a man who built a suicide machine and then used it to kill himself using plans he found on the internets. When I first heard of this I thought he was selling his life, which would have been ten times more awesome. I always found the plot to Hostel dangerously alluring. But he’s just selling his stuff… And in the immortal words of Ian Mackaye, “You Are Not What You Own.”

On Usher’s web site, http://www.alife4sale.com, you can find out all the details. Or just watch this:

This isn’t the first time someone has tried to sell their life on eBay. But maybe you should try renting before you own. If you don’t want Ian Usher’s life you can always RENT A GERMAN.

Who would ever sell a life to the highest bidder? Sounds like a easy way to start to industrialize agriculture in a new country though and destroy a few cultures and generations of lives in the process…

I have no idea when this was announced, but the Rockstar Mayhem Fest looks pretty decent. Granted I’ll be at the beer tent for all most of the show, they managed to pull some heavy ass bands along on the same tour. Notable acts include The Red Chord, Mastodon, Machine Head, Dragonforce, Slipknot and my personal favorite, Underoath.

Still, some of the other acts are really out of place. Disturbed managed to get the direct support spot, but I guess I can’t complain too much as someone who still digs Slipknot. From the press release:

BURBANK, CA – March 17, 2008 – ROCKSTAR ENERGY MAYHEM FESTIVAL announces
today that hard-hitting metalcore band UNDEROATH will headline the HOT TOPIC STAGE at
this summer’s highly anticipated tour, set to kick off July 9th at the White River Amphitheatre in
Seattle. The much-buzzed-about tour will hit 30 cities in the U.S. and Canada between early
July and late August. A full itinerary will be announced on April 1 with the festival’s Pre Sale
commencing on April 4 and the national on sale to commence on April 19.

Underoath joins an all-star lineup that includes main stage
closer SLIPKNOT, DISTURBED, DRAGONFORCE and MASTODON and a plethora of hard
music’s most influential artists and exciting young voices. The tour will have two second
stages: Underoath will headline the HOT TOPIC STAGE and MACHINE HEAD will
headline the JAGERMEISTER stage. The second stages will also feature BLACK
TIDE, SUICIDE SILENCE, AIRBOURNE, FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH, 36 CRAZY
FISTS, THE RED CHORD, WALLS OF JERICHO and the JAGERMEISTER Battle of The
Bands Winner.

Tour title sponsor ROCKSTAR ENERGY DRINK, who will be offering product samples and
providing great surprises for attendees, will also be presenting the VIP area THE ROCKSTAR
LOUNGE where a national contest will take place, and fans can PARTY LIKE A ROCKSTAR in the
VIP area. Details for this special promotion will be forthcoming and can be accessed at
www.rockstar69.com

Festival organizers have also announced that world famous freestyle motocross team METAL
MULISHA—known for its lineup of legendary riders—are joining the riotous road show,
performing three backflip-laden sets at each date in the festival area. “The Rockstar Energy
Mayhem festival combines the best bands in extreme music with the Metal Mulisha rebels,” says
freestyle Motocross legend Brian Deegan. “They’ll be mixing the sound of riffing and ripping
250CC motorcycles flying 150 feet in the air against the backdrop of double bass drums and
shredding guitars.”

Word.

As ETID’s vocalist Keith Buckley discussed with our very own Mike Kieran in Synthesis Digital, Every Time I Die knows how to throw a good party. (Actually, they discussed literature and life on the road…same thing, really.) Part of this includes making every person at the show feel like they’re a part of that show. (It also involves the ample use of cowbell.) Sometimes they just have to have every screaming kid in the audience up on stage to sing with them…

Now, sometimes the security at the venue isn’t quite ready to handle the rush of bodies to the stage. Kinda like what happened last week at The Warehouse as part of the Take Action tour. Thus far, unconfirmed reports of ETID’s show in Houston, TX on 3/6/08 include a near-riot when the band invited the crowds to join them on stage. Apparently, the security tried to stop the crowd and ended up briefly fighting members of Every Time I Die.

From Absolute Punk:

I’m sure I won’t be the first to report this, and hopefully someone else has more info, but tonight at the Take Action Tour during the last song (Ebolorama) of Every Time I Die’s set, Keith invited literally EVERYONE from the crowd on stage with him to sing. So, needless to say, after an invitation like that, the crowd went nuts and trampled over the barricades past the security guards onto the stage. It was absolute pure chaos on stage and in the crowd. One of the security guards at the venue (Warehouse Live) kept trying to hold kids back that were trying to get on stage, and the next thing I know, Jordan of ETID is being attacked by the aforementioned guard for letting them up. Keith aparently dropped the mic and rushed to his aid. After a couple seconds, the music stopped, and Jordan came back on stage, his guitar head completely snapped off. He kept flicking the guard off and spitting at him as he was leaving. Keith was bleeding, and disappeared backstage. The lights came on and the venue cued the background music, and all the kids on stage kinda scrambled off the stage slowly. Jordan and Andy came back out and were talking with kids in the crowd. I don’t have the entire story, but hopefully the band releases a statement on the altercation. This was the Take Action Tour, and I swear there was more negativity here than at most shows I’ve been to recently.

Surely the Security have their side of the story. In other news, good rock shows are nutz.

I know what you’re asking, “There was a first wave?” Yeah, I’m kind of fuzzy on that too. I remember hearing of a band a few years back, Skyforger, out of Latvia that combined crushing black metal intensity with traditional folk instrumentation (check out “Tumsa Un Sala” on their MySpace page — it’s rifftastic). That group formed in 1995, so maybe they’re the first wave.

I didn’t really get hip to this stuff until last year when Finnish pagan folk metal group Finntroll released Ur Jordens Djup. Despite being rooted in ancient folklore and brandishing an unrelentingly heavy sound, the album had a wild party sort of vibe that reminded me more of Gogol Bordello than what you’d expect to hear from a metal band, especially with the track “Korpens Saga.” The album has been dancing around the digital bonfire that is my iTunes play list ever since it first crossed my desk. Here’s a video for their song “Nedgang,” and it’s almost as cool as Krull.

This leads us to Eluveitie, who are hailed in their press release as “the leaders of a new movement, which has been capturing the imaginations of listeners worldwide.” I hesitate to call anyone the leader of anything, but I’m definitely hooked. Eluveitie, hailing from Switzerland, are much more melodic (think In Flames) and heavier on the folk instruments than Finntroll, but bring the same level of heat. Tomorrow will see the release of their third full-length Slania for Nuclear Blast. Juggling both jangly acoustic passages with full bore metal, Slania moves at a cinematic pace and would be perfectly suited as the musical accompaniment to a Braveheart-sized medieval battle epic.

Eluveitie has already been featured on MySpace Metal (though I’m not sure how such a thing would be viewed by people who are really into metal), and in addition to the new album the group will be a part of Pagan Fest USA, which will bring Eluveitie to the US and Canada along with like-minded groups such as Tyr, Turisas, Ensefirum and Suidakra. Dates are below.

Key Dragon. I’ve got to be blunt. I’m not a fan.

I have a soft spot for female fronted goth metal. I’m a sucker for heavy, theatrical bands like After Forever, Within Temptation… I even interviewed ex-Nightwish frontwoman Tarja Turunen recently, and that shit was hot. (Her new solo album is pretty fucking good, coincidentally.) But I thought KeyDragon’s recordings sound a bit flat (at least on their SonicBids page), and their songs were pretty basic musically. However, all their lyrics are about dragons, and that wins them major kudos in my book.

KeyDragon is made up of Ron Langford (synth, bass, drums and vocals), Bobby Blackmon (guitar and bass) and Tamara Venus Star (vocals), and they hail from beautiful Grass Valley, CA (seriously, you should visit). They describe their music as “Dragon Metal,” which combines elements of “goth, doom and power metal.” Unfortunately, I hear a lot of the first, but not enough of the latter two. However, other than making music, they also seem to be all about raising the public’s dragon awareness. From their Web site:

KeyDragon takes you on a mythical journey through time to explore the many legends of the Dragon. The songs are about Dragon legends from around the world and from the time of 60 BC to 1900s AD. The Dragon legends contained in these songs have been thoroughly researched and are the most accurate legends of our time. You will explore Dragon tales from biblical times, the Crusades, the Romantic Era, The Renaissance, The 1700s, 1800’s, and the 1900’s. These legends come from around the world. There are legends from North America, South America, Europe, Asia, Africa, and Australia. These legends come from people of all walks of life. These legends exist among the tribesmen, native Indians, peasants, nobles, merchants, crusaders, warriors, and priests.

I always thought it was neat that all cultures, even those far removed from one another, had some form of dragon in their mythology. What does it mean? Do they actually exist? I’d like to think so. If you’re the curious type, KeyDragon’s got you covered in that regard as well. The band has a page devoted to dragon resources. Myths are important. They give us some sort of common ground, I think, they can teach us a lot about our history and the cultures of our ancestors. I hope that’s one thing humanity doesn’t lose in its push toward becoming purely digital beings. Cheers to KeyDragon for doing their part to keeping myths alive.