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Though it remains somewhat secretive, many of Britain’s major financial institutions have begun employing astrologers to help navigate the currently rife-with-peril financial markets. Maybe the US should start giving that shit a try:

Christeen is one of a growing, albeit secretive, network of astrologers who work for seemingly conservative British institutions such as high street banks, City investment funds and retailers. Desperate to avoid financial meltdown in the ongoing ‘credit crunch’ and to spot fashions and consumer trends before they start, these institutions have turned to the stars to divine the future.

“Most academics distrust astrology and regard it as mumbo-jumbo,” she says. “The thing is, it works. Nobody’s sure how it works but it does. Most of my clients are businesspeople who are very canny. If it didn’t work for them, then why would they use it?”

The story goes on to recount the astrological affinities of Hitler, Ronald Reagan and Boris Yeltsin among others and ends with, of course, the speculation that all planetary signs are pointing towards….wait for it…2012! as being a time of immense upheaval:

“In 2012 we’ll be entering the precession of the equinoxes, which is the most important thing that’s happened in the last 26,000 years. That suggests that something mega is going to happen. There will be a huge change in the world’s psychology caused by a huge natural disaster or a massive change in spiritual beliefs. We have an interesting four years ahead of us.”

A useful meme indeed!

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