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The bored folks at Something Awful once again come through with some mindless lulz, this time in the form of .gifs created from an old Army Training Manual.

Paul Mawhinney, a Harrisburg, PA business businessman is putting his private record collection up for sale on eBay, which wouldn’t be such a big deal if it weren’t arguably the World’s Greatest Music Collection, consisting of over 3 million records, 300,000 CDs and over 6 million song titles:

Every genre of American music is represented: rock; jazz; country; R&B; blues; new age; Broadway and Hollywood; bluegrass; folk; children’s; comedy; Christmas, and more. No other collection in the world – publicly or privately held – even comes close.

More than half of the recordings in this incredible collection are NEW, with individual records worth hundreds or thousands of dollars each on the collectibles market. Covering many decades of music, the collection includes 78’s, 45 singles and EP’s, LP’s, and CD’s.

At present the collection is stored in a 16,000-foot climate controlled warehouse, where Mawhinney has been busy attempting to catalog the contents of the collection, but, according to his web site “ Advancing age, declining health and associated financial concerns, are forcing the owner of the collection to part with the result of his lifelong passion. It’s not a decision made lightly or without considerable soul searching.” And though he has put his collection on the open market, starting his eBay auction at a cool $3,000,000, Mawhinney is only interested in selling the collection to the right sort of buyer:

The history of 20th century music belongs in a museum (existing or new), or a music library. The collection’s owner is seeking a private collector or a philanthropist willing to buy and donate the collection. A donation would qualify as a tax-deductible event. The collection contains many thousands of duplicate copies, which could be sold individually on the collectibles market to recoup a substantial part of the purchase price. If you’re contemplating creating a museum around the collection, we can help with additional exhibits and design services.

So hey, rich fucks. Need to bury a few million in tax burden in some charitable cause? Why notbuy this record collection for your alma mater and be the coolest alumus in the history of the universe? Even better, if you’re a rich fuck interested in the lulz (ATTN: MARC ECKO), why not buy this shit and put it all on Limewire? Kids who would rather buy bottles of Mad Dog with their allowance than music will thank you for your generosity!

So we know that Jared Leto gets pissed, like that one time he choked out Elijah Wood for clowning his band, and that one time he tried to fight Brad Pitt and got his faced all smashed up. So it’s not all that shocking that the other night, when his band 30 Seconds to Mars played London’s Hammersmith Apollo, he bashed some Brit in the head with a mic. What is, however shocking, is that YouTube has made it hard to drink in the lulz by taking down every video of the incident within minutes of it being posted. So while the above video may work for now, in the event of an lulzkill, you can also find the footage here, hereand probably a bunch of other places I’m too lazy to look for. Its cool to beat people with the mic and all, but we liked it better when Leto used to just pop EPIC BONERS onstage instead. That shit is HOT.

The trailer for the new Judd Apatow / Seth Rogen flick Pineapple Express. This movie will definitely be lulz.

Roy Scheider, best known for his role as Police Chief Martin Brody in JAWS and for his role in the totally lulz Samuel L. Jackson GIF that was popular on the internet for about 3 minutes, died yesterday at the age of 75.