Google Trends managed to again spark up a great deal of humor in my life today as I traced back the current #17 trend, the Parents’ Television Council, back to their roots. The group is apparently is pissed off at Family Guy for such minor issues as showing a menially handicapped horse killing deaf kids, said horse licking Peter’s ass in his sleep and depicting Stewie knowingly eating horse sperm in his cereal… no big deal, right?!

Besides being mad at a show that clearly has a track record (not to mention the viewer disclaimers) that would give any responsible parent enough forewarning to restrict their child’s television access for this particular program, the council is pretty much mad at all of t.v. On their website, they publish a beautiful guide that illustrates what shows are appropriate for their children, which is perfect when you want to feel like a great parent without relying on your own common sense and judgment. They’re currently taking signatures to overturn court rulings like the currently defunct CA Violent Video Games Act, which in a nut shell is scaring them because they fear that kids playing Duck Hunt is going to lead to the next Columbine.

I would suggest you poke around their website, liked HERE, for a quick reminder that some parents like to keep their children on a tight leash by following advice that an overbearing source tells them rather than sitting down with their kids, answering questions they have about some of the material they feel too racy and explain to them why they can’t watch a particular show. Remember: convincing yourself you’re doing the best job possible raising your kids is all that matters. For members of the Parents Television Council to reply back to me, which I would greatly appreciate, please click HERE. Thanks for your understanding.

Front flipping off a roof on a bike to a downhill slope can be dangerous.

Also, keep in mind that mini-golf can be dangerous.

Last, remember that domestic violence can be very dangerous.

Pundit Kitchen, a division of the Cheezeburger Network (FAIL Blog, I Can Has… etc.), is a typical Lol Cats style image board based around the metaphorical porta-potty that is the US Political scene. I stumbled upon it today, and am about 10 pages deep in teh lulz. In typical fashion, the site has their ultra high tech LOL Builder to make your own.

When you think about eating cats, the first race of men that comes to mind are of course those legendary gormandizers of animals small and tall, the Chinese. However, it seems Peruvians have gone a step further than their trans-Pacific brethren by hosting a yearly, two-day Cat Eating Festival:

The ‘Gastronomical Festival of the Cat’ sees townsfolk in Canete, near Lima, feast on the fluffy pets for two days. They believe that eating cat burgers – and fried cat legs and tails – can cure bronchial disease. It is also believed that feline meat serves as an aphrodisiac. The cats are bred especially for this festival – which takes place at the end of September on the Day of Santa Ifigenia.

If you speak Spanish, watch this video and translate it in the replies so we can all drink in the lulz of Peruvians housing Cat leg burgers.

… goes to this guy.  Aside from natural selection being a proven way to weed out the morons, it’s just fucking hilarious to watch people FAIL. Here’s a little bit of lulz for your Monday, so cheers!

Guitarist of megalomaniacal (sic) speed seeks audience who won’t combust

I’d like to start this off by saying one thing: IF YOU DON’T LIKE GUITAR, IF YOU HAVE A FAMILY HISTORY OF CARDIAC INFIRMITY, OR IF YOU ARE IN ANY WAY OF A WEAK DISPOSITION, HIT THE BACK BUTTON RIGHT AWAY.

Postscript: I think I’ll have to have you sign documentation of release before we meet, however, as I am a wanted man in 48 states for assaulting an officer via sweep picking, and my guitar playing has been banned in Norway for causing several churches to burn to the ground. And yeah, I’ve never been to Norway.