Do whatever.

Why be this?

When you can be this?

Srsly

Words of note in this clip: “Brave.” “Survival Story.” “Scoot.”

Brave Jessica? Someone please explain the bravery here. Then I realized it: IT’S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!!!!

Anyone else feel life eating some fucking McDonald’s?

Who needs a costly film cam when you got a digi, photoshop, some skills and a groove that just won’t stop? Check Time Machine’s video for “The Groove Won’t Stop” from their upcoming 2nd release, Life is Expensive, out 5/20.

Lead single to Time Machines upcoming album, LIFE IS EXPENSIVE. Directed by JetSetJay, Jerome D and Evan Guidera. Starring Randi Astrid and Shelly Nicole.
www.myspace.com/timemachine
www.glowlikethis.com

From Score Press’ Release:

TIME MACHINE is making a name for themselves these days… one party at a time. The trio of emcees Biscuit and Jet Set Jay, and DJ / Producer Mekalek is playing all the hot weeklies from Dim Mak Tuesdays and PYT in LA, to Roxy Cottontail’s Heartbeat in NY, and winning over fans with their seamless set of high-energy party rapping and tongue-in-cheek synchronized dance routines.

However, the east-coast bred, LA-based squad knows that every night has its last call, and that much of life is what happens before doors open the next evening. And so, on their new album, LIFE IS EXPENSIVE, the crew balances the rolling good times with a shrewd awareness of the cost of living… both literal and figurative.

John, that’s “Cougar” to you, Mellencamp is due out with his 23rd album on July the 15th. Title of record? Life, Death, Love and Freedom. Considering his last release was entitled Freedom Road and rode a brown water wave off the ham hock Chevy truck mega hit “Our Country,” I would have to say that Life, Death, Love and Freedom is one of the worst album names in the history of music. I don’t think Mellencamp is a bad guy; his intentions are good and he sings out against racism and the likes. But shouldn’t there be a limit to the amount of cheese on that burger, John?

“Only two things come from Texas, son, and that’s steers and queers. And I don’t see no horns on you boy.”

Texas is a land of machismo. Oil wells. Cattle. Cacti peppering the dusty plains, where men chew gravel and spit out asphalt. Or maybe my mom just watched too much Dallas when I was a kid. I don’t know, but I certainly have an impression that it’s a manly state.

Still, the place is not without its more leftist lifestyles, including a healthy contingent of homosexuals. When I noticed the Gay Flag on a bar a block away from the hotel I thought, “well bless their hearts. The roughnecks haven’t driven the gays from the streets of Austin.” And yes I know Austin is the most liberal places in the state, but still.

The thing I noticed most about this gay bar was that it was full of regular old people watching rock ‘n’ roll bands. And that’s what Austin gay bars have in common with the countless UT frat bars that line the 6th street corridor: during SXSW their clientele is pretty much the same: industry people and hardcore music fans getting fucked up and watching hundreds of bands. Together. As One. Ommmmmmm…..
Rock Music: the great equalizer.

(UPDATE: I apologize for the brief all-caps diatribes about broken cameras and hating internets, which I have since deleted. I was drunk and shit was not uploading and Brit and Matt were telling me to hurry. It was an intense and frustrated moment. No offense intended.)

It’s not that I’m against scream-y post-jazz prog odyssey nonsense, nor do I find Euro-Fros that offensive, it’s just that in my opinion Sparta wins over Mars Volta in the post-At The Drive-In rock contest. Still, a million and one hipsters in tight pants can’t be wrong, so we’re bringing you some tour dates.

December
31 San Francisco, CA - Bill Graham Civic Auditorium

January
9 South Burlington, VT - Higher Ground
11 New Haven, CT - Toad’s Place
12 Providence, RI - Lupo’s Heartbreak Hotel
14 New York, NY - Terminal 5
17 Philadelphia, PA - The Fillmore at the TLA
18 Baltimore, MD - Rams Head Live!
19 Columbus, OH - Newport Music Hall
21 Toronto, Ontario - Phoenix Concert Hall
01-23 Detroit, MI - St. Andrews Hall
01-25 Kansas City, MO - Beaumont Club