Video Matt can usually keep his cool around the swinging dicks he typically associates with, but watch as pop-songstress and fashionista Katy Perry seems to get your boy a little rattled when she puckers up and tries to lay some lips on him. MEMO TO VIDEO MATT: when the broad with the #1 song on the Billboard charts makes kissy noises next to you, GO FOR IT BRO!!!11

I am sitting here, seriously almost barfing at this news: The Gene Simmons Sex Tape. I couldn’t really stand his pervertedness on his reality show, Family Jewels. Now I have to hear about a mega-gross sex tape?! Nassty.

A website is purportedly hosting a sex tape featuring the 59-year-old Simmons with a blonde model named Elsa. For a mere $10 US, KISS fans can allegedly watch the aging lothario get it on in all his nasty glory at GenesSecret.com, which features a short trailer of the clip on its homepage.

Elsa is a spokesmodel for Frank’s Energy Drink, which claims to “keep you yodeling all night long!” and is endorsed by Gene Simmons. Ha! You can’t make this shit up, people.

Now that our blog is for the moment focused on interracial relationships…

I twice kissed a black guy. And I loved every moment. Their lips were soft and juicy and I wanted to just fall fast asleep right there. Plus they have really smooth game.

However, the best lips I’ve ever kissed were Mexican. That’s you, Gerardo. X