John McCain warned today that the Republican Convention, set for next week in St.Paul, MN may have to be postponed due to Hurricane Gustav, which is currently pwning Cuba and on track to hit the Gulf Coast…you guessed it, right around the time McCain will be accepting his nomination. I’m not sayin, I’m just sayin…

Yes we fucking can!

Man, he really could’ve been the next Bill Clinton:

John Edwards repeatedly lied during his Presidential campaign about an extramarital affair with a novice filmmaker, the former Senator admitted to ABC News today.

In an interview for broadcast tonight on Nightline, Edwards told ABC News correspondent Bob Woodruff he did have an affair with 44-year old Rielle Hunter, but said that he did not love her.

Edwards also denied he was the father of Hunter’s baby girl, Frances Quinn, although the one-time Democratic Presidential candidate said he has not taken a paternity test.

Edwards said he knew he was not the father based on timing of the baby’s birth on February 27, 2008. He said his affair ended too soon for him to have been the father.

A former campaign aide, Andrew Young, has said he was the father of the child.

I’d still vote for him before I’d vote for John McCain, but that’s just because I ain’t a player hater.

Finally a campaign ad worth watching: Paris Hilton for President.

MCCAIN-NOCEROS IS COMING! HIDE THE BABIES!!ONE!

gGGAHHAHAHAH!

Future President Presidential Nominee Barack Obama turns 47 today, which happens to be around the of McCain’s great, great great-grandchildren. The candidate celebrated with events in Michigan and Boston, but not without his aides accidentally losing his gift.

Barack Obama’s aides have a better track record organizing his campaign than his birthday.

A gift they purchased for the Democratic presidential candidate, who turned 47 on Monday, went astray Sunday evening — left in the trunk of a taxi along with an aide’s suitcase.

“We got him a present that he really needs, and one of our guys was bringing it back and left it in the trunk of a cab last night,” communications strategist Robert Gibbs told MSNBC.

He said efforts were under way to recover the present, but was mum on exactly what the gift was.

Well, thats not too bad.  Bush managed to lose the hopes, dreams and souls of the entire population of the United States, Obama’s men just lost a scented candle and a day planner.