Man, Jimmy Kimmel is screwed. After 5 years in a relationship that made no sense, Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman have ended their run. The late-night talk show host, previously the host of The Man Show, kind of lost a prize here.

There’s always been something odd about this relationship. Some people call her a horse-face, but I don’t think she’s all that bad. It almost seemed like Silverman was slumming it… oh well.

Sad news for comedy and monogamy fans: late night talk-show host Jimmy Kimmel and his girlfriend of five years, comedienne Sarah Silverman, have broken up.
Kimmel’s rep Lewis Kay and Silverman’s rep Amy Zvi both confirmed that Jimmy and Sarah are no longer dating and issued a joint statement that “Jimmy and Sarah have and will have no further comment.”
With them, so has the faith of all those believed—as we did—that their union was the binding force that kept Hollywood from exploding in a mass chain reaction of irony and sexual frivolity.

In the meantime, Synthesis has obtained an exclusive YouTube video of Silverman’s excuse for leaving him.

Oh Damn. Get your tivo/dvr/betamax: El-P and Aesop Rock (click here to check out “None Shall Pass” )will team up for a live performance on Jimmy Kimmel Live on Friday, August 10th [ABC weeknights, 12:05 AM / 11:05 PM CST].

And since Aesop is dropping his new record on 8/28 he’s hitting the road - here are the date:
Aesop Rock Tour Dates

07-28 Seattle, WA - Capitol Hill Block Party
09-06 Portland, OR - MusicFest NW

W/ Cage, Rob Sonic, Blockhead, DJ Big Wiz, DJ Signify:
09-08 Philadelphia, PA - Starlight Ballroom
09-09 New York, NY - Irving Plaza
09-10 Washington, DC - 9:30 Club
09-11 Pittsburgh, PA - Rex Theatre

W/ the Octopus Project, Rob Sonic, Blockhead, DJ Big Wiz, DJ Signify:
09-13 Chicago, IL - Metro
09-14 Madison, WI - Barrymore
09-15 Milwaukee, WI - Pabst Theatre
09-16 Minneapolis, MN - First Avenue
09-18 Detroit, MI - TBA
09-19 Cleveland Heights, OH - Grog Shop
09-21 Baltimore, MD - Ottobar
09-22 Providence, RI - Living Room
09-23 Boston, MA - Middle East
09-25 Northampton, MA - Iron Horse
09-26 Burlington, MA - Higher Ground

W/ Rob Sonic, Blockhead, DJ Big Wiz, DJ Signify, Black Moth Super Rainbow:
10-10 San Francisco, CA - Fillmore
10-12 Los Angeles, CA - Henry Fonda Theatre
10-13 Phoenix, AZ - Clubhouse
10-15 Albuquerque, NM - Sunshine Theatre
10-16 Durango, CO - Abbey Theatre
10-18 Denver, CO - Cervantes
10-19 Boulder, CO - Fox Theatre
10-20 Ft. Collins, CO - Aggie Theatre
10-22 Salt Lake City, UT - In the Venue
10-25 Portland, OR - Wonder Ballroom
10-26 Vancouver, British Columbia - Commodore Ballroom
10-27 Bellingham, WA - Nightlight
10-28 Seattle, WA - Showbox
10-30 Eugene, OR - WOW Hall
11-07 Asheville, NC - Orange Peel
11-09 Orlando, FL - Club Firestone
11-10 Miami, FL - Studio A
11-12 New Orleans, LA - House of Blues
11-13 Baton Rouge, LA - Spanish Moon
11-15 Dallas, TX - The Loft
11-16 Houston, TX - Warehouse Live
11-17 Austin, TX - Emo’s
11-19 Nashville, TN - Exit In
11-20 Atlanta, GA - TBA