The title of this post was originally going to be “In My Room, Furiously Beating Off Until I Cum Blood” but I figured Bill might get pissed off at that one and stop paying me….But really, that’s exactly how stoked I am at the announcement of these upcoming tours.

Seriously, if you claim to appreciate heavy music you must attend one of these shows. (Actually, I can’t personally attest to Man Man’s heaviness, but they sound kinda vaudeville/old-timey, and that’s pretty rad too).

RAD TOURS ALERT:

Big Business w/ The Melvins: September 16th - October 22nd

Jesu w/ Torch: October 18th - October 30th

Man Man: September 16th - October 19th

I will be doing nothing but pushups and curls until these shows, then smoke all sorts of opium right before the shows and be THAT GUY. Look out for me. I mean it. DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!

Tour Dates after the jump: (more…)

I’ve been listening to Jesu since December of 2005 when I received their self-titled debut. It took me little time to figure out that Jesu is fronted by Justin Broadrick, the main guy from Godflesh, who won me over during my dreary days as a college disc jockey.

I finally saw Jesu live for the first time during SXSW 2007. Coincidentally, it was their first time visiting the states because visa issues had defeated them prior (Justin writes extensively about it in his blog).

I know music journalists are supposed to keep their cool, sitting off to the side of the stage, arms folded in front of them, stern look of concentration on their faces. But I’ve always thought that forced stoicism was absolute bullshit. So there I was front and center, hair in slow-motion headbang, arms outstretched, fully rocking. To hell with the non-believers, this was what I came to Austin for.

People ask me what my favorite part of SXSW 2007 was. I’ll answer “Jesu.” (That is, when I am not answering “The Mountain Goats” or “Melvins with Big Business” or “Andrew Bird” or “Robyn Hitchcock with Peter Buck” or whatever pops into mind as being above awesome.)

I wrote a long-winded history of Justin K. Broadrick and Jesu, complete with purple prose, mixed metaphors and a reference to Shiva . Read it after the jump if you like.

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