Breath easy internet, I have returned to my blogging post. Over the last week and a half I’ve been journeying up the Pacific Coast with Bear Hunter . As it turns out, when I try and write on my laptop while in the van I start to puke all over my band mates — hence, my absence from Synthesis Blog. Over the next few days I will be recounting my harrowing journey (in between fascinating posts about pop stars getting busted for drugs, children with weird growths on their bodies and general paranoid-paranormal fodder). Get ready, dear readers. Get your asses ready.

But really, what worthwhile thing on the internet is SFW? There will be dirty words following the jump, so if you’re the type of person who gets offended easily…seriously, what are you doing on the internet?
Turn this off before you burn your eyes and go back to the warm embrace of mommy or Jesus.
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