I am sitting here, seriously almost barfing at this news: The Gene Simmons Sex Tape. I couldn’t really stand his pervertedness on his reality show, Family Jewels. Now I have to hear about a mega-gross sex tape?! Nassty.

A website is purportedly hosting a sex tape featuring the 59-year-old Simmons with a blonde model named Elsa. For a mere $10 US, KISS fans can allegedly watch the aging lothario get it on in all his nasty glory at GenesSecret.com, which features a short trailer of the clip on its homepage.

Elsa is a spokesmodel for Frank’s Energy Drink, which claims to “keep you yodeling all night long!” and is endorsed by Gene Simmons. Ha! You can’t make this shit up, people.

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