Ted Kennedy Has Brain Cancer

Senator Edward Kennedy announced today that the seizure he suffered this weekend was found to be caused by a cancerous brain tumor:

A cancerous brain tumor caused the seizure Sen. Edward M. Kennedy suffered over the weekend, doctors said Tuesday in a grim diagnosis for one of American politics’ most enduring figures. “He remains in good spirits and full of energy,” the doctors for the 76-year-old Massachusetts Democrat said in a statement.

They said tests conducted after the seizure showed a tumor in Kennedy’s left parietal lobe. Preliminary results from a biopsy of the brain identified the cause of the seizure as a malignant glioma, they said.

Goes to show you that no matter what you do, you’re gonna die eventually and nothing will matter anyway. So really, why even try? Why not just sit around and eat pizza and get wasted and do nothing with your life, that way when you die there’s less shit for people to forget about you.