Last week I detailed my experience getting run out of Starbucks like a filthy vagrant despite my dedicated years of patronage. I got a response from the corporate office that said they had forwarded my e-mail to the district manager, who would be contacting me soon. Today I received said dispatch:

Daniel~
My name is Cheryl and I am the district manager for Starbucks Coffee Company in the Chico, Red Bluff and Susanville area. I am sorry not to have responded sooner, but did not get your email forwarded to me until my day off. I am currently looking into this and will be addressing it ASAP! Something that concerns me is that for an extended period your drink has been given a derogatory name, I’m ok with that if you call it that but not our partners, it is essentially a no water Iced Americano, which is a menu item just as a triple iced espresso is! I am very sorry for your experience and hope to be able to make it right for you, not only for your last experience but the continued experience! Please feel free to contact me and thank you so much for bringing this to our attention!

AH, VINDICATION! Even better was the fact that in the interim, I had already pinned a far lulzier version of my original e-mail for publication in the weekly edition of the Synthesis, which hit the streets this morning. It is reproduced below for your edification. More updates are sure to follow!!11 Stay tuned…

(more…)

Ah the irony! On the same day that their new earning report showed a 21% drop in quarterly earnings, widely attributed to a drop-off in customers, the Downtown Chico Starbucks, which I’ve been fiercely loyal to for the last five years, if not longer, lost me as a twice-daily customer on account of some stupid ass shit. For your edification, I’ll reproduce here the letter I wrote to Starbucks customer service department:

I’ve been going to the Starbucks in Downtown Chico every day, some times, two or three times a day, for the last five years, if not longer. It truly had become, to borrow the Starbucks parlance, my “third place”. For about the last year I’ve been ordering the exact same drink, every single time: three shots on ice in a venti cup. The baristas usually joke about it being a “ghetto latte” since it is cheaper than getting an iced latte but essentially the same thing once you put some cream in it. However, with all the signage in place saying things like “your drink should be perfect” etc, I really didn’t think it was a big deal. Today however, the manager of the store (who has served me the drink in question dozens of times) informed me that I was “stealing” from Starbucks by putting milk in my drink and made it clear that me and my business were no longer wanted, or needed, all in front of the numerous people waiting in line behind me This is unfortunate in many ways, not the least of which is the fact that, in my job as a writer for local, regional and national print and online publications, I have always made it a habit to talk about how much I love Starbucks, despite the hipness currently associated with corporate bashing. I have defended Starbucks in the face of criticism more times than I can count, but now I wish that I had chosen otherwise. If you want to bill me for all the milk I’ve “stolen” over the last 5 years of patronage my address is above.

Fuck it. Peets is better anyway.