My friends and I like to drink. We like to drink because we like to get drunk. We don’t like to get so drunk we wake up in a pool of our own piss and vomit (which has been known to happen at times) but we like to see how close we can get to that point while still having a good time. JUDGE ME!!!

Luckily for us we live in a small college town (Chico CA! What!) and booze is cheap as fuck. Wednesday nights, while dudes in L.A. are standing in line, obeying the STUPID fucking dress code, and paying a 20 or 30 dollar cover just for the privilege of paying 16 bucks for a shot and beer, we here in Chico enjoy what is called “Buck Night”. That’s right ladies and gentlemen, want a beer? One dollar. Want a whiskey coke? One dollar. Shit, last night I paid for a drink with 4 quarters I found on the counter before we left the house! (I know it sounds pathetic, but I’m broke so fuck off.)

It was on one of these buck nights that we discovered the best way to start off your night of boozing EVAR! It’s called the Combo Combo, in honor of our local shitty 24 hour diner, Jacks. A Combo Combo at Jacks is basically for the people that want one of everything on the menu. At Denny’s it looks something like this, but at Jacks it has way more shit:

The Combo Combo as it relates to booze is: One shot of Jack Daniels whiskey. One Coke chaser. One Jager Blaster (a full Red Bull with a double shot of Jager served in a pint glass and downed like a shot). One ice cold Bud Light bottled beer.

When you order 2 Combo Combo’s it looks something like this:

It’s the perfect way to start off your night because after taking it you can just sip on beers all night to maintain your buzz, and the Red Bull gives you that extra shot of energy you need to build up the courage to go get rejected by a bunch of girls that are way out of your league.

Get on the Combo Combo train or you are blowing it hard!!! Just remember, don’t go overboard with them or you will end up like this dousche:

Loss.

Denver Nuggets All-Star Carmelo Anthony was arrested yesterday morning on charges of drunk driving after weaving in traffic and failing to pass a field sobriety test.

The two-time All-Star, 23, failed a series of field sobriety tests and was taken to a Denver Police Department lockup where he consented to a blood test and posed for the [above] mug shot. The Smoking Gun

Carmelo was later released to a “sober responsible party,” and has a court dater set for May 14th. News of this incident shouldn’t come as any surprise. Anthony’s past is littered with controversy. In 2004 he was cited for marijuana possession, although his friend, James Cunningham, signed an affidavit assuming responsibility for the incident and in 2006 he took part in the infamous Knicks-Nuggets Brawl at Madison Square Garden.

(more…)

Just when you thought, “Hey, isn’t it about time for a rapper to release another energy drink?” Lil Jon shakes the suburban-white-kid to the core with Little Jonathan wine. [WAAAT?!]

“I’m not no `drink wine every day’ kind of dude,” he said in a telephone interview. “I’m not like an expert, so don’t ask me no questions … I just like the taste.”[OKAAAAAY!]

“My full name is Jonathan,” the Atlanta-based artist said. “The wine is more nature: I wanted to not just have a direct connection, but make it just a little bit more upscale than regular ‘Lil Jon.’ … This is not no ghetto Boone’s Farm; this is some real wine.” [YAAAAYEAH!]

Hm… he knows nothing about wine, and yet he can assure us it’s not Boone’s (who’s website is from, like, 1995). Synthesis has some friends at BevMo that are going to hook it up. Stay tuned for reviews, straight from my pimp cup! The more I think about Lil Jon’s ventures, the more it makes sense to me. College kids are going to go crazy for this stuff. Carlo Rossi ain’t no rapper!

In case the 12-year-old suburban high school douchebags in all-over-print hoodies and stunner shades weren’t proof enough that crunk/hyphy/etc. al hadn’t jumped the shark long ago, the latest nail in the coffin comes courtesy of our friends at Fearless Records, who today announced their plans for a Punk Goes Crunk compiliation. From the press release:

Fearless Records (Plain White T’s, Sugarcult, Mayday Parade) will release Punk Goes Crunk in April 2008. This compilation will feature popular rock, pop, screamo, and punk artists covering popular rap and hip-hop tracks.

Punk Goes Crunk will include songs off of the never released Immortal Records compilation, Yo! Indie Rock Raps, such as Say Anything, Kenny from The Starting Line, New Found Glory, The Maine, Hot Rod Circut, My American Heart, and Scary Kids Scaring Kids. This album will also include tracks from All Time Low, The Devil Wears Prada, Set Your Goals, and other artists who will be announced soon.

Tell When to Go! DUMB DUMB DUMB DUMB

Dallas loves Fall Out Boy. Kinda.
I’m listening to the remix of “…Arms Race” feat. Travis of GCH, Kanye West, Tyga, Paul Wall (w. Skinhead Rob), Lupe Fiasco & Lil’ Wayne (damn thats alotta bling), and for some reason I dig it. I’m loosing scene points with you as you’re reading this, arn’t I?

For those who want to take an adventure into the scene-pop/crunk-hop world, go here