[The following article, written by Bob Howard for Synthesis Weekly, was originally published in the print version of Synthesis on Monday, May 19th, 2008. He can be reached at bob@madbob.com]

Keep on Drinking
By Bob Howard

“Be it destiny or free will, there are those amongst us who might do the rest of society a favor by staying on the couch, taking bong rips and playing the latest version of Grand Theft Auto.”

A Long History of Stupid: I’ve just started reading a biography of long-time FBI Director J. Edgar Hoover, and as a result, I’m learning quite a lot about the history of this country and the tradition of our government cracking down on dissent. This latest episode of our history is far from the first time the Bill of Rights has been superseded and suspended in the name of “security.” I have yet to grasp the logic of suspending freedoms to ensure security when I thought that the whole thing we are trying to secure in the first place is freedom; but I digress.
Anyway, here are some interesting factoids I’ve picked up thus far: Remember when in protest of the French dissent against the “War on Terror” our Congress made the brilliant move of re-naming French Fries “Freedom Fries?” Seems like a pretty creative manifestation of nationalistic stupidity, right? Wrong. During World War I, our Congress re-named Sauerkraut “Liberty Cabbage.” Our current stupidity isn’t even original! How do you like that?

Think the threat of terrorism is a new thing? Wrong. Just prior to and then after World War I, the Red Scare developed. Anarchists and Communists were on the rise and there were actually a series of letter bombs and bomb attacks that riddled the nation’s capitol and industrial power figures.
These attacks lead to a complete abridgment of the freedoms granted in the Bill of Rights. Anyone suspected of being a communist, a socialist, or a sympathizer — essentially any Russian factory worker — was rounded up in mass arrests and many were unceremoniously deported so quickly that there wasn’t even time for an appeal.

More heartwarming thoughts after the jump. (more…)

The following is a Synthesis Weekly column penned by Bob Howard, whose written works can also be found here

…Democracy is a poor system; the only thing that can be said for it is that it’s eight times as good as any other method. Its worst fault is that its leaders reflect their constituents…”

- Jubal Harshaw from Robert Heinlein’s Science Fiction Classic “Stranger in a Strange Land.”

Here is an amazing factoid. President George W. Bush holds the record for both the highest and the lowest approval ratings since the inception of the Gallup Poll. In the days following 911 his ratings were in the 90’s - now they have sunk down to the 20’s. Do you ever imagine he must scratch his head sometimes and think “what the hell do these people want?” To me this doesn’t represent any dramatic shift in the man or his policies but rather the fickle and schizoid temperament of a population so focused on the zen of immediate gratification and the satisfaction of every conceivable urge that consequence has become not just an after-thought but a non-thought. Then we wake up and look around at the wasteland gross consumption has made of the world around us and go “hey, what the fuck? This sucks!”

So as we sow so shall we reap… I read that someplace or another. Fuck it, pop another pill, pour another drink, shovel some more processed food into our ever-fattening faces - its all going over the cliff now anyway. Everything under the sun is “green” but our level of CO2 emissions hasn’t gone down an iota since Al Gore’s eye-opening climate change documentary “An Inconvenient Truth” came out two years ago. Lip service and clever marketing campaigns are all we have to show for an awful lot of good intentions and even a little bit of hard work.

I’m starting to think this whole thing is bullshit. The ones talking the most about climate change seem to overlap neatly with the same ones leaving the largest “carbon footprints” - the globe-trotting celebrities, the politicians in their private jets, the educated upper-middle class with their air-conditioned McMansions and their ever intact sense of entitlement. Sure it’s a lovely idea to actually cut our consumption - but that would mean we might actually sweat and feel hungry once in awhile! Intolerable. Doesn’t fit in with the whole “satisfy every craving immediately” philosophy that defines the American existence in this year of our Lord 2008.

The Thing That Would Not Die

Hillary Clinton is decidedly still in the race after what is looking like a decisive 10 point victory in Pennsylvania. I don’t know what I think about that. Ask me now and again in five minutes and I’ll likely give you two completely contradictory answers. I like that this primary is actually up for grabs but I also can’t stomach the idea of a continuation of the policies of the last eight years and it seems like the longer the democrats squabble over the nomination the more likely it is no matter who gets it will end up being defeated by another stodgy old white dude in a dark suit bowing down to the gods of corporate enterprise and industry. Wonderful.
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President Bish better have my money. I’ve heard that “check is in the mail” shit before. hell, I probably said it a time or two. Well, our president says that they’re ahead of schedule. President Bish, in an attempt to raise his public profile and prevent a lynching once he leaves office in January, is giving us, the American taxpayer (well…most of us), a little payback…in the good way. because, you know, we’re not already in debt for trillions of dollars. Schwarzenegger’s going to cut funding to California schools to the tune o 4 billion dollars. Here’s Your Mad Money! Yay! America! Fuck Yeah! Where’s my money, Bish!?

President Bish Quoted From Washington Post:

Good morning. It’s obvious our economy is in a slowdown. Fortunately, we recognized the signs early and took action. I signed an economic growth package that will provide tax rebates to millions of American families and workers to boost consumer spending. On Monday, the Treasury Department will begin delivering the first of these tax rebates by direct deposit. During the first week alone nearly 7.7 million Americans will receive their tax rebates electronically. Then on May 9th, the IRS will begin mailing checks to millions more across America.

Wesley Snipes is pissed. I get $600. The world is still fucked. This whole thing is retarded and will not work. But thanks for the cash anyway. More good news Idiocy after the jump. (more…)

[Synthesis blog once again brings you the philosophy of Synthesis Weekly columnist Mad Bob. With no further adieu, we present to you Immaculate Infection.]

Beauty, Paranoia and Black Holes

J. Edgar Hoover: J. Edgar Hoover was the former head of the FBI and a severely sinister and creepy individual. He was twisted and power-hungry and would stop at nothing to increase his own influence and prestige. He built the FBI into a potent law enforcement tool but he also used that potency to achieve his own selfish and strange gains.
One of the suspect activities the FBI indulged in under Hoover’s watch was to secretly wiretap figures within the Civil Rights movement. As a result, the FBI accumulated hours upon hours of clandestine footage of Civil Rights leader Martin Luther King Jr. While the practice is dubious and illegal, historians today are absolutely ecstatic to have this treasure trove of information that shines a light into the personality of such a dynamic public figure.

It turns out that what Martin Luther King Jr. revealed in those tapes is even more selfless and righteous than his public personae. He was not an attention-seeker; in fact he consistently bemoaned the public role that was thrust upon him. King spoke often of being tired, of just wanting to go back to being a preacher, which he felt was what God had called upon him to do. But, with the encouragement of the people with whom he had surrounded himself, he pushed on until the fateful day he was assassinated in April of 1968. Incidentally, there is more than a little suspicion that Hoover’s FBI was involved in that incident.

Listening through these tapes, Hoover did not take away the beauty and selflessness of the man in question. Instead, he focused his attention on King’s imperfections. The tapes revealed that King was an adulterer and Hoover quickly labeled him a sexual deviant and a hypocrite. He found every avenue he could to dehumanize and tear down a great man.
It is difficult for me to explain this, but I feel badly for J. Edgar Hoover. How could a man have so much hatred in his heart that they fail to see the brilliance of a once-in-a-lifetime figure like Martin Luther King Jr.?


Withdrawing the Benefit of the Doubt: It is jading, but helpful, to understand that there are people out there very much like this — people whose hearts are so hardened and filled with cynicism that they would miss the beauty that surrounds them. The truth of the matter is that the establishment is fundamentally afraid of change. It makes sense; if one has power, they will do whatever they have to do in order to hold onto it. This is why you will never see the Federal Government choosing to decentralize its power and shift it to states and local government. This is why the establishment was afraid to let blacks and women vote. This is why the Chinese army drove tanks into Tiananmen Square, and this is why more recently the Burmese Government slaughtered monks. This is why the establishment crucified a man for speaking a new philosophy and causing agitation amongst the populace.
So anyway — I have a tendency to give people the benefit of the doubt. For years I have, in my head, reconciled George W. Bush’s actions with the unique pressures and situations he finds himself in. I have said to myself, “Well, I’m sure that his intentions are good.” I formally withdraw that benefit of the doubt. I have come to the conclusion that people like Bush and Cheney simply don’t see the beauty in this world. Bush may see beauty in some perceived afterlife, and as for Cheney, I am not convinced he sees beyond dollars and cents and beyond the limitations of his own lifetime. My conclusion is that these guys are in it for their lifespans and then they’ll leave the mess for generations after them to deal with. It’s a sinister world view, but actions don’t lie. You don’t break laws, establish a secretive cabal-like government, drop bombs, consistently increase military spending and wage preemptive warfare because you’re trying to create a peaceful and tolerant future. It is pure and simple retention of power.

Black Holes and Cosmic Lessons: It goes on and on. But we can find pertinent patterns in nature. A black hole sucks everything into it until, as the theory goes, it reaches critical mass. Then all the accumulated centralized energy and power bursts forth and is once again disseminated to the universe.
Power centers will crumble, establishments will fall.
Come on people — send me your thoughts and ideas. Madbob@madbob.com.

Bob Geldof, musician, actor and Live 8 event organizer, recently met with George W. Bush who has been meeting with rock stars who wear their hearts on their sleeves in an effort to make the world a better place.
In this article published in Time, Bob Geldof writes about their meeting about Africa, including the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief and Global Fund to Fight AIDS, Tuberculosis and Malaria, and the humanitarian mission that will train African peacekeepers.

I recommend you read his article. Geldof, as you can imagine, is an opponent of the Bush Administration’s War in Iraq. At the same time, Geldof is a strong proponent of African aid, something the Bush Administration is strong on as well (though that fact rarely gets headlines). This dichotomy comes into play in Geldof’s article in a really natural way, where he basically says Bush is a gracious host and good guy, it’s a shame that all the good things his administration does gets overshadowed by Iraq. But that whole Iraq thing…yikes, that’s a crime.

If you’ve been paying attention to national news lately you might have noticed that the Bush Administration is taking a massive strap-on dildo to our collective ass. Just right there where you poop. First Bush has pardoned the Telecommunication companies that are allowing the government TO SPY ON ITS CIVILIANS, now he’s cutting funding to the forestry service. If you’re like me and am unsure of who is representing you in decisions like these, you can find out here. After reading the articles after the jump, I hope you are agitated enough to do so. (more…)