Virginia GEORGIA (thanks anon) Congressman Lynn Westmoreland, who despite wanting to display the 10 Commandments in the Halls of Congress, famously couldn’t name them when asked on camera by Stephen Colbert (as shown in the video above) made himself look even more like an idiot today when he called Barack Obama “uppity” while discussing his new hero Sarah Palin:

“Just from what little I’ve seen of her and Mr. Obama, Sen. Obama, they’re a member of an elitist-class individual that thinks that they’re uppity,” Westmoreland said.

Asked to clarify that he used the word “uppity,” Westmoreland said, “Uppity, yeah.”

Of course, he omitted the second word that almost always follows a Southerner’s use of the term uppity in reference to a black man who is acting a little above his station, but anybody with a brain knows what he means. Ah! AMERICA!!

Like Stephanie Miller says, Sarah Palin’s nomination as the Republican VP candidate is straight out of SNL. You sersiouly couldn’t write easier attack points for someone with half a brain to use against the Republican ticket, let alone someone as badass as James Carville, who absolutely pwns all challengers, including some shit brained Republican congresswoman. News might actually be worth watching this week just to see all the carnage.

That being said, I’m really not looking forward to seeing this woman, and her running mate, Emperor Palpatine, most likely win the election this November. After all, never underestimate the stupidity, and duplicity
and utter idiocy of the American electorate. ITS GONNA BE FUN!!11

This weekend I got a chance to join Los Angeles-based comedy group/saviors of rock Fortress of Attitude for a few shows. They were down a bassist and I was glad to fill in. I even had a snazzy gay sailor outfit to match their particular stage-dress idiom.

On Friday we made our way to Oakland, CA, and ended up performing in a warehouse art space called the Ghost House. We performed with several Oakland bands (Kool Teen, Pinched Nerve and Anderson Congress) in the space the house uses to create children’s videos.

The series is called Showbeast, and it’s the kind of kids show you’d probably think twice about showing your kids. Enjoy.

The brain hat is what we used to collect the money. FYI, people like to give you money when you use a brain hat.

So this summer, I took some time off to go on tour, which was of course an interesting experience, to say the least. Among the more compelling things to happen during this tour was a dream I had after one of the last stops on the tour at the Granada Theater in Lawrence, KS (which was, probably not coincidentally, one of the drunkest stops of the tour as well). In this dream, I somehow had figured out that consciousness was nothing more than a signal being beamed into our brains, brains that acted as nothing more than satellite receivers or perhaps more fittingly, TV sets, taking this signal and playing it out on the screen that is “reality.” Although I have had many bizarre dreams in my day, this particular dream seemed particularly epiphanic, but I didn’t really think a whole lot about it since I was A) hungover as F B) riding in a van for 10 hours to Omaha and C) not really sure exactly what I was supposed to with this new “knowledge” or who I was supposed to share it with or whatever. So I just kind of forgot about it .

UNTIL TODAY, when I read this chapter today from Your Eternal Self, the forthcoming book from R. Craig Hogan. Among the enjoyable insights provided, is this nugget provided by a Reuters interview with British physician Dr. San Parnia:

He speculated that human consciousness may work independently of the brain, using the gray matter as a mechanism to manifest the thoughts, just as a television set translates waves in the air into picture and sound.

Reading this, as well as the rest of the chapter (which I recommend if you have the time) made me remember this aforementioned dream, which I had totally forgot about until now. Though this by itself is pretty cool, there is yet another coincidental fact making it seem, IDK….SPOOKY. This coincidence is: the night that I had this dream, the show we were playing was being filmed by a camera crew for inclusion on the deluxe edition of Emery’s new CD, I’m Only a Man, which (drumroll)……….CAME OUT TODAY!!!1 I mean, I’m not saying I’m just saying. Actually what I’m really saying is, read Chapter 2 of Your Eternal Self, then go down to Best Buy and get the deluxe edition of the new Emery record. Then maybe the secrets of the Universe will be revealed to you as well. Goodnight and Good luck.