YES.

The first black man to be elected the Democratic Presidential Nominee. YES.

I know you’ve been waiting on baited breath for Synthesis to chime in on the latest blog craze: “Is There A Naked Woman Reflected in VP Cheney’s Sun Glasses??? OMG!!!”

I’m no stranger to conspiracy theories (I even subscribe to a few myself), but let’s weigh the likelihood of the naked-lady-in-the-glasses theory in like this. Here’s what would need to happen:

1. Dick Cheney, hanging with a naked woman.
2. The hired photographer taking an official photograph of Cheney with a Naked Woman just hanging out by the side.
3. Secret security just hanging out, letting it happen.

Savor those ideas. Roll them around the tongue. Can’t help but spit that out, eh?

Here’s a thought: DICK CHENEY IS NOT HEF. Let’s review.

Hugh Hefner:

Vice President Dick Cheney:

Do we need to go over that again? Good.

Now, if Cheney was as good at marketing as he is at being an evil bastard, he would be marketing his own brand of Cheney Stunna Shades.

“Wanna have naked women reflected in your shades ALL THE TIME? Try a pair of Cheney Nunna Nunna Nunnas. Now in gold fleck!”

I’m not gonna tell the blogosphere to get their mind out of the gutter (far from it), but just think about this for a second, alright? Now listen to Chico’s The Hooliganz and get your slump on. And vote Obama. End of story.

John McCain and David Letterman exchanged insults in a duel roast monologue in his return visit to The Late Show With David Letterman

From the NY Times:

“He looks like the guy at the hardware store who makes the keys,’’ he said, according to a transcript provided by CBS. “He looks like the guy who can’t stop talking about how well his tomatoes are doing. He looks like the guy who goes into town for turpentine. He looks like the guy who always has wiry hair growing out of new places. He looks like the guy who points out the spots they missed at the car wash.’’

Then Mr. McCain walked out on stage.

“Hi, Letterman,’’ he said. “You think that stuff’s pretty funny, don’t you?”

Then Mr. McCain unleashed a slew of his own you-look-like-a-guy jokes at Mr. Letterman.

“Well, you look like a guy whose laptop would be seized by the authorities,’’ Mr. McCain said. “You look like a guy caught smuggling reptiles in his pants.’’

Mr. Letterman interjected: “Don’t knock it if you haven’t tried it.’’

Mr. McCain continued: “You look like the guy who the neighbors later say, ‘He mostly kept to himself.’ You look like the night manager of a creepy motel.’’

“Well, that’s what I need,’’ Mr. Letterman said.

Then Mr. McCain delivers the coup de grace: “And you look like the guy who enjoys getting into a hot tub and watching his swim trunks inflate.’’

On Tuesday, everybody was a comedian. The Democratic National Committee came up with its own April Fool’s day list of the “Top 10 Reasons to Vote for John McCain.” They included “Early Bird Specials at the White House cafeteria,” “Finally, the President of the National Press Club will be made a member of the cabinet,’’ “Best Karaoke Song Ever: ‘Bomb, Bomb, Bomb, Bomb, Bomb Iran’ ” and the number one reason: “The last seven years have been so great, let’s have four more!”

Who needs bee costumes when you got Chilean midgets in drag dancing with dudes in bondage masks? As our homie C Bloom would say, La Pequeña Hillary Clinton ain’t no punk.

Shocker.
Even though countless people have begged him to stay out Ralph Nader said he’s running for President as a third party candidate. 73 year old Nader is running under the idea to “shift the power from the few to the many.” Sounds great on paper right?

Mike Huckabee enjoyed reminding CNN that Nader’s past runs have shown that he pulls votes from the Democrat and said “So naturally, Republicans would welcome his entry into the race.” Thanks for the reminder Mike…

Nader added “If the Democrats can’t landslide the Republicans this year, they ought to just wrap up, close down, emerge in a different form.” Kind of a good point if you think about it.

For the record most of us here at Synthesis are pulling for Obama.

New York City Mayor, and self proclaimed “not a candidate” for President came out swinging against the recently passed economic stimulus legislation today, saying that the $600-$12oo rebate checks to be paid to American taxpayers as part of the stimulus is “like giving a drink to an alcoholic”

“Nobody wants to sit there and say, ‘Well there’s no easy solution,”‘ Bloomberg said. “They want to send out a check to everybody to stimulate the economy. I suppose it won’t hurt the economy but it’s in many senses like giving a drink to an alcoholic.”

He also noted that the US “has a balance sheet that’s starting to look more and more like a third-world country” but added that his comments were just part of an “experiment” in trying to shape the debate for this year’s election. Experiment eh?