Those wily Alaskans, Portugal. The Man stopped by Synthesis Weekly Managing Editor Ryan Prado’s apartment above the Senator Theater in Chico,CA a few days back during their tour with Minus the Bear to chop it up and perform a few of their amazing songs acoustic as part of our Live @ Ryan’s video series. Check out the band belting out “Church Mouth” above and stay tuned to our YouTube channel for more songs and an interview with the guys.

I was just snooping around MySpace, checkin’ everyone’s comments out to see what’s up, when I came across a flier promoting an N2Deep show at LaSalles, a local watering hole in Chico.

“WTF?” says I. “Why do I know that name?”

Then I YouTubed them. “Back to the Hotel” yes yes I remember. Now I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I actually wanna go to the show. And I actually want to interview Jay Tee. While some people may think the retro days of boy rap groups are wack, I’ll embrace this shit for a minute if only for the nostalgia. At least these cats are coming through my small-ass town finally! And not even to the Senator, but to LaSalles! Maybe I can even drink one of these with Jay Tee:

I don’t know if this is indicative of all their songs, but after checking out the “Echoes” video, Set Your Goals is okay in my book. I usually don’t listen to this sort of thing, because I don’t wear eyeliner, but I do like the fact that the band isn’t afraid to be pop-y. They holler out shitty harmonies like no one’s business, and they just don’t give a fuck. Best of all, there’s no misguided metal influence in this song, and that’s refreshing, because the only thing worse than something not being metal is something pretending to be.

Set Your Goals is a part of the Bamboozle Roadshow 2K8 and will also be playing every date on this year’s Warped Tour. They even played Synthesis’s hometown of Chico recently, and we got some video of it. If you’re planning on stalking the band this spring and summer, their full itinerary is after the jump. (more…)

Usually my entries into the hallowed halls of the Synthesis Band You’ve Never Heard Of…OF THE DAY!!111 archive have some sort of clever plot device or other thematic tie together. But today’s selection, the Simi Valley based Fire On the Plains is just an honest to God badass band that I you more than likely have never heard of. The band recently completed a West Coast tour, stopping through Chico this past weekend. And though I had heard the songs streaming on their Myspace, which featured the typically pissed vocals and skronking guitars found in most modern thrashy metal bands, the recordings do no justice to the band live. The vocals were heavier, the drums were unflinchingly on point, and the band’s seasoned stage presence belied their youthful exuberance. The band currently has a self-released EP available, and will be playing around Southern California over the next couple of months, including a show with metal upstarts Carnifex. LEARN ABOUT IT!

I know you’ve been waiting on baited breath for Synthesis to chime in on the latest blog craze: “Is There A Naked Woman Reflected in VP Cheney’s Sun Glasses??? OMG!!!”

I’m no stranger to conspiracy theories (I even subscribe to a few myself), but let’s weigh the likelihood of the naked-lady-in-the-glasses theory in like this. Here’s what would need to happen:

1. Dick Cheney, hanging with a naked woman.
2. The hired photographer taking an official photograph of Cheney with a Naked Woman just hanging out by the side.
3. Secret security just hanging out, letting it happen.

Savor those ideas. Roll them around the tongue. Can’t help but spit that out, eh?

Here’s a thought: DICK CHENEY IS NOT HEF. Let’s review.

Hugh Hefner:

Vice President Dick Cheney:

Do we need to go over that again? Good.

Now, if Cheney was as good at marketing as he is at being an evil bastard, he would be marketing his own brand of Cheney Stunna Shades.

“Wanna have naked women reflected in your shades ALL THE TIME? Try a pair of Cheney Nunna Nunna Nunnas. Now in gold fleck!”

I’m not gonna tell the blogosphere to get their mind out of the gutter (far from it), but just think about this for a second, alright? Now listen to Chico’s The Hooliganz and get your slump on. And vote Obama. End of story.

Not that this is necessarily a broad scoped piece of news, but nevertheless, I feel like trying to stack up some sort of credibility today. My apartment, in the Tower of the Senator Theatre in lovely Chico, CA, will once again play host to a slew of acoustic sets by touring bands. Tonight’s lineup will consist of OG Tooth and Nail punks MXPX, Vagrant Records badasses Protest The Hero, all followed by a set by The Color Fred.

For a taste of what the fuck I’m talking about, check out last week’s acoustic set and interview with Armor For Sleep, as well as the interview with Metro Station.

I’ve always wanted to run my own venue… And not pay the bands SHIT. My dreams have come true!