I don’t even know what to call this look. Jenna-anime? 

This is the final straw for Heidi Montag. The girl doesn’t even have a proper website, yet she’s all gung-ho about a singing career and now a fricken clothing line, which I’m sure she launched just to be a bitch to L.C. It comes as no surprise that her line is full of FAIL. It features a paper-thin tank tops that are too short, some shiny black hot pants with a 1 inch inseam, flimsy t-shirts with a dated and unoriginal looking logo of a heart with wings. I swear, if I see anyone rocking this gear, I’m going to weep out of pity for their soul.

This just goes to show, life’s not fair. Even no-talent assclown cyborgs with big tatas can get paid. That’s it. I’m going to get a boob job. Wanna invest in my breasts? I hereby promise to only do smart things with them.

From thinkfashion.com:

There’s just one problem. The clothes are terrible. Heidi’s line is a combo of trashed-up stripperwear and beachy-blah t’s and minis – a strange mix, but nothing we don’t see every Saturday when we hit the Old Navy then follow up with a lap dance at the local strip bar.

From New York Mag’s Fug Girls (who are hilarious, btw and you should really read the whole thing for some quality worktime chuckles):

This is the worst fashion line in the history of fashion lines… No self-respecting grown woman should allow herself to be seen in these garments.

Luckily, it’s possible no one else is interested. Not only were we alone in visiting Heidiwood, we were the sole shoppers at that Anchor Blue, period, exposing us to the naked curiosity of the employees. “Are you a … fan of Heidi?” one of them asked. We murmured something unintelligible, much like the previous day when we called to confirm the clothes’ arrival and the store clerk said, “Are you … um … interested in the Heidi Montag stuff?” He might as well have enquired, “Are you eating glass?” But the store’s emptiness ultimately saved us — with customers nearby, we’d have lacked the guts to open the dressing-room doors.

If you find a *good* review of this clothing line, please post a link in the comments.

In partnership with the fine folks over at Loserkids, we here at Synthesis are proud to present the Macbeth Digital Magazine. Like your normal magazine, it features interviews and features starring the bands, artists, designers and great minds behind Macbeth Shoes including: Tom DeLonge of Angels & Airwaves, legendary poster artist Drew Struzan, Sherri DuPree of Eisley and many more. But since its digital, we are also able to incorporate some more interesting tidbits, such as video clips, mp3s and other assorted bells and whistles. The best part though, is the fact that you can download it for absolutely FREE right here. Don’t say we never did nothing for ya…

I know you’ve been waiting on baited breath for Synthesis to chime in on the latest blog craze: “Is There A Naked Woman Reflected in VP Cheney’s Sun Glasses??? OMG!!!”

I’m no stranger to conspiracy theories (I even subscribe to a few myself), but let’s weigh the likelihood of the naked-lady-in-the-glasses theory in like this. Here’s what would need to happen:

1. Dick Cheney, hanging with a naked woman.
2. The hired photographer taking an official photograph of Cheney with a Naked Woman just hanging out by the side.
3. Secret security just hanging out, letting it happen.

Savor those ideas. Roll them around the tongue. Can’t help but spit that out, eh?

Here’s a thought: DICK CHENEY IS NOT HEF. Let’s review.

Hugh Hefner:

Vice President Dick Cheney:

Do we need to go over that again? Good.

Now, if Cheney was as good at marketing as he is at being an evil bastard, he would be marketing his own brand of Cheney Stunna Shades.

“Wanna have naked women reflected in your shades ALL THE TIME? Try a pair of Cheney Nunna Nunna Nunnas. Now in gold fleck!”

I’m not gonna tell the blogosphere to get their mind out of the gutter (far from it), but just think about this for a second, alright? Now listen to Chico’s The Hooliganz and get your slump on. And vote Obama. End of story.

Designer Gas Masks: brought to you by artist Diddo Velema. They are conceptual art pieces, made to look like they are designed by Gucci and Louis Vuitton… Sorry, gas mask fanatics, they’re for gallery purposes only.

How much more elitist can one get? I guess if you’re facing the apocalypse, might as well do it in style: “Thanks, Gucci! You saved my life!”

I need one of these…

Gamucci.com