In celebration of the Olympics starting in two days I bring you… Beer Olympics! Jimmy Clausen, Notre Dame quarterback, recently got himself in some hot water for partaking in the Beer Olympics when pictures of the games surfaced. Proof that Facebook really can come back to haunt you.

Basic rules & regulations:

Equipment: Keg (or 2), bat, ping pong balls, hard alcohol, shot glasses, a funnel, red cups, ten+ worthy drunkasses. Matching jerseys will definitely up your teams morale.

Games played, quickly & in order: Dizzy bat, beer pong, flip cup, quarters and the funnel (aka beer bong).

For some reason “The Thong Song” is the theme song of the opening ceremonies and the Baja Men are supposed to play as the winner stands on the podium.

The Rules, Events, and Ways to Become a Champion:

In the real Olympics (the one without the beer) there are multiple events with solo and/or team competitors all vying for medals in a variety of sports. You don’t have the time, energy, or alcohol tolerance to do any of this, so the best way to have the most fun while getting the largest number of competitors involved is the Team Relay event. Take your participants and split them in half, preferably in old school kickball pick-teams style, and be sure to choose your team wisely as they’ll have to be skilled in all areas of drinking and boast a very high alcohol tolerance, an uncanny ability to play drinking games, and most likely an embarrassing GPA. Now that you’ve got your team and forced them through the random drug testing, to make sure that they are inebriated, you can move on to the competition.

McCain, whaaaat? Obama, who?!

I’m telling you, it’s all about Anderson Cooper!!!

If any man can save this nation, it’s The Silver Fox! yeah, staring into those baby blues is so subliminal, it could only result in wold peace right? well, at least a few cents off the gas pump (i hope).

Anderson is not only politically savvy but he’s also keen on pop culture and isn’t afraid to speak his mind. and yes, he too is sick of Lindsay Lohan…

Synthesis has been listening to Devin The Dude for awhile. In fact, he’s quite popular among the college crowd here in Chico, Cali. He’s got something to P-S-SAY for those who hate their 9 to 5:

High Y’all Doin (Episode 2 - PSA) from Devin The Dude on Vimeo.

The latest stream of anti-meth ads are getting a little disturbing.  I’m guessing that it’s working considering I see faces of twearkers in my nightmares.  At this point, I’m just glad I don’t have kids, because fielding a “why does that lady look like a zombie” question from a 6 year old girl doesn’t sound too appealing.

Check out this brief video interview with Jake Kotze in which he explores the possible synchronistic elements present in the events of 9/11, pop culture and history, including Stargate, 2001 A Space Odyssey, freemasonry, the pyramids and all sorts of other gangster shit. Thanks to Reality Sandwich for the knowledge. If you don’t have that shit bookmarked you’re losing at the internet.

If you thought the burgeoning emocide in Mexico was bad, recent legislation in Russia that lumps emos in with skinheads is shutting down Russian emo and goth web sites and all around making life for Russian emos even that much more miserable:

First came the Chechens, then ethnic Georgians, and then maverick journalists. But now Russia’s cracking down on a different social group, a demographic they see threatening the very future of their country. These rebels have pierced lips, ridiculous haircuts and too much eyeshadow. They’re barbarians in bowler hats, leather jackets and torn-up tights. Yes, emo has come to Russia – and its leaders want no part of it.

Last month the State Duma held a hearing on “Government Strategy in the Sphere of Spiritual and Ethical Education”, a piece of legislation aimed at curbing “dangerous teen trends”. There, without a clue in the world, social conservatives lumped “emos” together with skinheads, pushing for heavy regulation of emo websites and the banning of emo and goth fashion from schools and government buildings.

Oh well, its not like they probably understand what all the hollering’s about in all those MCR songs anyway.