Accessing our File Server is usually done with a double click on an alias. Today my computer decided to run some interference on that play.

No? That’s the right user name and password, I pinky-swear.

And then I hit OK about a thousand times. Fuuuuuukkkk… Maybe it’s mad that I wrote naughty words in my correspondence with Apple.

I made blog!

marriedtothesea.com

Waking at 2:30AM on Sat morning I wandered down to Centeroo to catch Girl Talk and Paul Oakenfold . Upon arrival I was taken back by the spectacle that was Girl Talk. The stage was filled with festival goers dancing, jumping, and going all around fucking nuts while giant air guns filled with streamers, toilet paper, and confetti were periodically sprayed over them and giant balloons as big as a sedan floated around the crowd on the ground. From “front to back” as Girl Talk mastermind Gregg Gillis would say was moving and enthralled with what they were witnessing, by far one of my top three of my top five performances (others in top five so far would be Animal Collective, Of Montreal, Beastie Boys).

After the end of Girl Talk I walked over to catch Paul Oakenfold who was the only artist left performing. I entered the gyrating and pulsing crowd where I was surrounded by every rave cliche you could imagine. Oakenfold however was anything but typical. He had the crowd in his hands never saying a word but melding songs seamlessly and interacting with the crowd with gestures simply telling the fans what to do and when. After dancing and watching for an incomprehensible amount of time I turned around to look out at the crowd and realized that it was daylight. Upon sighting the coming day my feet, back, legs, and toes began to cramp, spasm, and fail under my chubby little belly. I knew I had done it all, and knew if i didn’t leave now I would end up asleep a third the way to my camp site in the classic Bonnaroo shit/vomit/mud mix that IS FUCKING EVERYWHERE!

Luckily I made it to the front of my tent.

I think it was my tent.

By the end of the day on Saturday, I’d seen and heard over twenty bands of music’s finest. White Rabbits and People Under the Stairs were the heroes of Thursday’s lineups, but the festival and its patrons were just getting their feet wet. With a merciless thunderstorm late on Thursday night, the feet of every Bonnaroo-er were not just wet, but downright slopped with mud. Nobody was fazed. Crowds were wild and packed for a hypnotizing Animal Collective ; thousands were cutting up the lawn with funky dance moves when New Orleans’ Galactic brought the noise… and the 10 minute horn battle; they swooned and screamed for Al Green , adorned in a proper suit and holding a bouquet of roses. In James Brown fashion he addressed the crowd, flirted with some Betty’s in the front row, then commanded “BAND!” and the spot-on quintet ripped into a hip-shakin’ funk number. The Mars Volta brought as much energy as anyone so far, brought new life to rock improv, and brought a new drummer who wins my percussionist of the day award.

The sun continued to sizzle, the crowds continued to down the local microbrews, and Friday was long from over. Increasing crowds made their way to David Byrne , whose combo of musicianship and showmanship was almost unrivaled. Piping hot back up singers and dancers joined him on stage, and participated in the choreographed band dances. Then when everyone thought they’d seen it all, he leaves the stage and reappears wearing a tutu. They hadn’t seen it all anyway though, because they hadn’t seen the Beastie Boys . Picture them as good as you’d think they’d be, and then try to imagine something better. Even with a few structural hiccups in the music, the Beasties stole the show for me… with Mix Master Mike taking the title of best individual performance. I would’ve liked to hear “The Sounds of Science” but hey, when they bring out Nas to do Paul Revere and a few others, you really can’t complain.

My legs and liver had had enough at that point so I went back and tried to catch some Zs. I managed to get more in than usual and woke ready for another day of a non-stop talent party.

Next up, Ambler 2 with his lens on the day. Enjoy ya’ll…

Saxophonist Boney James will perform at the Radisson Hotel in Sacramento on Friday June 12th at 7:30 pm.

2009 KSSJ Smooth Jazz Concerts 

94.7 KSSJ presents Boney James with Special guest Brian Simpson in the Guzzetta Grove at the Radisson Hotel on Friday, June 12th.  Showtime is 7:30pm, doors open at 6:30pm.  Reserved Seats are $57 and General Admission are $40.  Reserved seats available on-line only, General Admission are available using cash only at the Radisson and with no service charge at the KSSJ studios.

I hate it when I go to use the bathroom and someone else’s turd, pee-pee and toilet paper are still in the bowl. It’s a two-fold shame; not only do you have to suffer the lingering stink that has suffused the entire bathroom, but the site of someone else’s turd is enough to make you want to vomit. Plus, you have to flush before you begin your own evacuation because the mere though of someone else’s pee and poop splash somehow getting on you is the vilest of vile thoughts. It’s kind of like this: