Is The New iPhone Out Yet?

I cannot wait. I’m going to get my hands on one of those new puppies asap. I’m not the only one, either. Several people in this office have been complaining about their phones sucking lately, enough to make me suspicious of Apple for some kind of iPhone conspiracy. Maybe Steve Jobs hired some secret team of geniuses to hack the mobile signals from the satellites or some shit because everyone’s phones here keep randomly shutting off. I, myself, have been without a working cell phone for like 5 days now because my charger has mysteriously disappeared. Damn gnomes.

I’m not even going to buy a new charger. I’m re-virginizing myself until the day I get my iPhone and we spend our first night together, touching buttons and exploring all its bells and whistles. Damn, I just checked and I guess it’s not going to be available until July 11th. Wahhh!!!!!!!!

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