Southern California Coyotes Want to Eat Your Children

Apparently, the coyotes of Southern California have decided that children would make delicious dinners:

Wardens have spotted the coyote that tried to drag a 2-year-old girl from her front yard Tuesday in Lake Arrowhead, about 65 miles east of Los Angeles, but did not have a clear shot to fire. They have since set up traps for it. Authorities were also investigating reports of two possible attacks earlier this year in the same resort town in which a coyote may have bitten two young children in the buttocks as their father barbecued on the deck.

In the latest case, police said her mother was photographing the toddler and her siblings in front of the house when she ran inside to put the camera down. That’s when a coyote tried to make off with the toddler. The girl was treated for wounds to the head and neck, but was expected to survive. Dotti Edwards, a neighbor, came home after the attack and spotted a scrawny coyote in the street. Her neighbors have complained of coyotes in recent weeks with reports of the wild animals sleeping in yards and pestering residents.

“They’re so brazen right now,” she said. “They just stand there and look at you.”

Earlier, a coyote attacked a 2-year-old girl playing in a city park in Chino Hills, a suburb 30 miles east of Los Angeles that is connected to a state park.

The next day, a coyote in the same place made a beeline for another child, but the father scared it away. Since last year, there have been seven coyote attacks in the Chino Hills area, including four in which children were bitten. State wildlife officials have killed 23 coyotes to protect the public

“If they see a young child and they have a chance, yeah they’ll take it,” said Kevin Brennan, a state wildlife biologist.

The problem will be easy enough to solve however. We’ll just keep building building McMansions and suburbs over the land where coyotes have lived for a bajillion years, keep shooting them whenever they act like coyotes, then wait until there’s like three left before deciding that we might actually like to keep them around, for posterity. The American way!

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